all i wanna do is stand close to you...

i'm sad...utterly and undeniably depressed
i must admitt...this was the shortest time i could handle it...
it's hard to miss someone who doesn't miss you back
and it hurts to love someone who doesn't love you back...
but i don't know why i keep on holding on to the impossible
when i know that i'd only end up hurt and confused
i let go of the others for this
but how am i supposed to let go of this one
when this made me forget about it all
how do you forget someone who made you forget about everything else?

i've been through this a thousand times
how come i can't move on through this one?
why do i keep looking back with hope in my eyes
when i know that it's never gonna happen
every word, song, expression cuts me deep
but i still hold on to it as if the pain is nothing
even if i'm already bleeding i still hold on to it
no matter how much it hurts
i'd rather get hurt while it's with me than lose it and get hurt twice as much

you can call me stupid but i don't care
you can call me blind i don't give a damn

hanging on by thread...i just can't seem to let go
even though i know i won't get anything back
here i am...still waiting
even though i'm waiting for nothing...

i tried...i really did

it's been only 3 days since the last time...but i really can't handle it. i always get these emotional breakdowns. i don't care if everyone reads this now...i just need to let it out. damn.

i tried to forget...i really did...but it just too hard. i can't erase those damn memories. it seems that everytime i try to forget the memories just flood back to me. i just can't take it anymore. but i can't do anything at all...nothing...except cry...cry...CRY!!!

all i can do is cry until my tears run dry. but even if they do...the pain is still there. it will never go away. and it seems that nothing can take it away. nothing at all...

why? why is this happening? all because of one thing...one stupid and crazy thing that shouldn't have started in the first place...damn!